Text Your Ex Back – Before Your First Text

Before you ever try to text your ex back after a breakup, there are certain things you need to think about that can greatly influence your success at getting back together. Text messages can be good or bad…an ally or your worst enemy.

And it all depends on how you craft and send your text messages to your ex.

Until recently there was little help and guidance available for sending text messages to your ex. Most relationship experts simply avoided the topic altogether or looked at text messages as some sort of fiery demon that was going to pull your relationship into the depths of hell never to return again.

But then along came Michael Fiore and his Text Your Ex Back program…

In November 2011, Michael Fiore opened his Text Your Ex Back ebook to the public, and it’s already considered by many to be the definitive guide on how to text your ex back after a breakup. You can learn more about Michael’s step-by-step guide by reading the Text Your Ex Back reviews found throughout this website.

The Text Your Ex Back PDF has been a godsend for many people because prior to the release of Michael’s ebook, most people went about texting the wrong way or ignored it altogether when trying to get an ex back.

But let’s face it, in today’s society text messaging from cell phones is an addiction. It’s one of the most powerful forms of communication we have and to ignore it altogether while trying to get your ex back seems kind of silly…doesn’t it?

You have to be careful though. You have to go about it the right way if you want to text your ex back. If done wrong, text messages can push your ex further away and close all doors forever. But when done right, text messages can help turn your ex’s emotions (both good and bad) into something positive that you can use to your advantage.

Michael Fiore calls this “text judo” and talks about it inside the pages of Text Your Ex Back. It’s super cool because even if your ex feels nothing but negative emotions toward you, it’s still possible to turn these feelings to your advantage.

What you don’t want is complete apathy (e.g. a complete lack of interest and no feelings (good or bad) whatsoever). Apathy, not hate, is the opposite of love, and the hardest place to pull your ex back from is when they are completely apathetic towards you.

Text messages are literally a “push button” solution which makes them pure awesome sauce. However, it also means they can get you in trouble if you don’t know what you’re doing.

Text messages give you incredible access to your ex. People are addicted to their cell phones and they don’t go anywhere without them these days. This means you have an awesome opportunity to seduce your ex back into your life.

But before you attempt to text your ex back, here are 5 things you need to think about…

5 Things To Consider Before You Try To Text Your Ex Back

One of the biggest mistakes people make when texting an ex is to dive head first into it without having any clear plan of action in mind. But I’ll try to keep you from making that same mistake. Make sure you can check off the following 5 things before you begin any sort of text messaging script.

1.) Make Sure You Want Your Ex Back For The Right Reasons

Don’t try to text your ex back unless you want to get back together for the right reasons.

Things like…

  • My ex is super hot.
  • I’m afraid to be alone.
  • I want to get back at my ex and make them regret leaving me.
  • I want to get my ex into bed one last time.
  • I just want to satisfy my own ego and prove to myself that I can get them back.

don’t count and should never be reasons to get back together with your ex.

So if the above are some of the wrong reasons to get back together with your ex, then what are the right reasons?

Michael Fiore, texting guru and author of Text Your Ex Back, says the right reasons to get back together with your ex occur when

“…you legitimately miss and appreciate your ex, feel like you’ve got a real connection, and feel like the reasons you broke up are things you can resolve, accept, or move past.”

And if your ex is emotionally or physically abusive, run away and don’t ever look back. Seriously.

2.) Text Your Ex Back Under The Guise Of Realistic Expectations

Getting your ex back after a breakup is usually a marathon, not a sprint. Slow and steady wins the race.

It doesn’t matter if you use text messages or any other method. It’s going to take some time. It’s going to take some work. It’s going to require patience, and you might take a few steps backward from time to time in order to move forward in the end.

But it’s ok, and it’s nothing to worry over or get upset about.

You also need to understand there is no “magic bullet” that works to get your ex back every single time. In the case of Text Your Ex Back, there’s no “magic text” that you can send and expect to have your ex back in your arms immediately. If you ever find that single “magic text”, patent it and protect it with your life because you’re sure to become one very rich man or woman.

You must be willing to accept the possibility that you might not get your ex back no matter what you do. There’s no guarantees. Sometimes it just doesn’t work out. You have to be open to moving on if it comes to that.

3.) Your Breakup Holds Clues That Will Help You Get Your Ex Back

Never try to text your ex back without first understanding what went wrong in the first place. Why did you breakup? Why do you want to get back together? What will make things different the next time around?

Sometimes it’s pretty cut and dry as to why a breakup occurs. Other times it seems to come out of nowhere. Regardless, you can’t expect to text your ex back and start a new relationship if you don’t understand why the old relationship fell apart in the first place.

At this stage of the process, you need to be completely honest with yourself. Ask yourself if you even want your ex back. As you think about it, you may come to the realization that you’re just feeling lonely and you don’t really want your ex back.

If you do want your ex back, then ask yourself why. What do you hope to achieve by getting back together? This doesn’t have to be anything over the top romantic, but it does need to be honest.

For example, it might be something like, “I want my ex back because they understand me better than anyone else”, “I want my ex back because I’ve never felt truly loved by anyone else before and can’t imagine not being in their arms ever again”, or “I want my ex back because they make me feel safe”.

4.) Obey The “No Contact Rule” Before You Try To Text Your Ex Back

If you’ve been through a breakup before or sought out relationship advice online, then you’ve probably heard of the “no contact rule”. It often takes many different forms, but the overall idea behind the rule is always the same: wait a certain length of time before contacting your ex after a breakup. In many cases, the no contact rule is stated as, “Never contact your ex after a breakup for at least a month.”

A no contact rule is often recommended because it gives you and your ex an opportunity to sort out your own feelings and emotions. It lets the situation “cool down” so you can think and act from a rational standpoint rather than one of uncontrolled emotion. It also gives your ex a chance to miss you and gives you time to figure out if getting back together is really something you want in the first place.

When trying to text your ex back after a breakup, the same rule applies. Don’t immediately send a bunch of text messages the day after you breakup.

If you do, then you risk saying the wrong things, letting anger and other emotions dictate what you say and do, and coming across as needy or desperate which are never attractive qualities. Remember, getting your ex back is a marathon, not a sprint. You have time.

The less you rush, the fewer mistakes you’ll make along the way.

5.) Don’t Attempt To Text Your Ex Back Using “Nothing Texts”

You’re almost at the point of sending that first text. You know what went wrong in the relationship. You’ve decided you do want your ex back and what you hope to accomplish by getting back together. You have a plan of action in mind and you’re remaining realistic about the situation.

You’re excited and nervous to make that first contact, but you just want to get it out of the way to calm your nerves.

Your first few texts are very important so keep the following things in mind as you start to text your ex back.

Text Your Ex Back – In Your First Few Texts, Don’t Be…

  • Needy
  • Desperate
  • Argumentative
  • Upset if you don’t get a response
  • In a hurry to talk about and/or apologize for things that happened in the past relationship

Instead, do…

  • Be fun
  • Be positive and upbeat
  • Validate your ex’s feelings. They are entitled to feel the way they feel even if you don’t agree with it.

You should also avoid what Michael Fiore refers to in Text Your Ex Back as “nothing texts”. These are texts that don’t really say anything and don’t create any curiosity or hook for a response. For example, texts like “Hi” or “What’s up?” would be considered nothing texts.

Instead, in the Text Your Ex Back download Michael Fiore discusses using “across the bow” texts as a way to make initial contact with your ex. Across the bow texts are messages that let your ex know they are on your mind, you don’t have any ill feelings toward them, and you aren’t needy or desperate (even if your stomach is churning and you feel like you’re going to throw up).

Just as a text message example, you could send something like, “I just watched the Saints win their first playoff game. It made me think of you because I know that’s your favorite team and I bet you’re super excited. Hope you’re doing great.” These types of texts are great because they have several key elements which you may or may not have noticed. For example:

  • They are positive, but not pushy.
  • They offer a subtle compliment (e.g. thinking of you made me smile)
  • They don’t put any pressure on your ex to respond.
  • They don’t make you appear needy or desperate in any way.

Across the bow texts are just one of many text message examples Michael Fiore explains and teaches you about in Text Your Ex Back.

Wishing you the best,

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